(little) grrrl meets world

Baby’s First Christmas

There’s a longer video of our Christmas celebration here, and the Flickr set here. Back tomorrow with a post on how we celebrated!

Merry Christmas Eve!

Emma’s first, originally uploaded by becky b..

We’re opening our gifts tonight, more pictures/videos to follow!

(well, Emma’s opening her gifts. Jerry and I decided for our Christmas gift we’re buying each other a dustbuster for our “crummy” kid.)

Christmas pictures

Thanks to my momma, who scanned the ones she got in the mail (note to self: use cardboard to protect pictures next time!).

Merry Christmas Eve’s Eve

News flash!

We have a tooth emerging! Emma is officially no longer a toothless wonder — I suppose now she’s just a wonder!

Seriously, though, I was beginning to think that my little girl was going to have to gum-it for the rest of her life. It’s pretty exciting that she’s finally getting teeth (and after she’s been weaned, no less!).

I get by with a little help

Emma tries to walk:

Letting go, going on…

[warning: disjointed post ahead]

This week has been one of emotional roller-coasters. I’ve been trying to let myself work through the different emotions of it all, rather than let myself get too swept away. Thankfully I’ve got a good support system here for me to call on when I need it the most.

Part of me thinks these emotions have to do with transitions: transitioning with Emma and weaning, transitioning from being a stay-at-home mama to a working mama, and the little transitions that’ll take place between me, Jerry, and Emma as a family in the months to come. That’s a lot of change to look forward to — and here we are, at the edge of it, enjoying these last few days together before we’re thrown into the deep end.

[This isn't to say I'm not looking forward to my return to work, because I am. I think it'll do us all some good to be on a routine of sorts, and I know that I'm a bit stir-crazy after sticking around at home 24/7. I love my job and am anxious to get things there back on track. That, and I admit, I'm excited to be back in the adult world.]

Yet at times I really do feel torn about all the transitions going on in my life right now. For example, the whole weaning process this week has been harder than I thought (physically and emotionally). While Emma led the way in easing off of breastfeeding onto bottle feeding, it’s been hard for me to close that chapter on our relationship. Breastfeeding was something that only I could give her, as her mama. The milk I produced was made especially for her, and sustained her for almost a whole year. While it’s exciting to see her growing up and embracing her independence, it’s still hard for a sap like me to let go.

However, I read something last night in my “baby Bible,” Dr. Sears’ The Baby Book, that made me feel better about the weaning process:

In ancient writings the word “wean” meant “to ripen” — like fruit nourished to readiness, its time to leave the vine. When a child was weaned it was a festive occasion, and not because of what you may think — “Now I can finally get away from this kid…” Weaning was a joyous occasion because a weaned child was valued as a fulfilled child; a child was so filled with the basic tools of the earlier stages of development that she graduated to take on the next stage of development more independently.

I can already see my little 11-month-old acting so independently, and I wouldn’t want it any other way. Still, the longer I’m a mama, the more I want to hold on and not let go — but I know that if I were to do that, Emma wouldn’t grow into the woman she’s meant to be.

Likewise if I want to grow, I know that I need to let go of certain things, attitudes, and events in my life that need to be set free. And I’m not just referring to those passing developmental milestones with baby, but the difficult milestones that are shaping me into the woman that I’m also meant to be.

Playtime with mama

Watch for Emma’s kiss!

Christmas Bargaining

Christmas Bargaining, originally uploaded by peachicken.

From Auntie Suzy’s Flickr photos.

Big grrrl cup